So much fun

I want to go have tons of fun

So much fun that I want to forget about my sorrows

So much fun that I could do no wrong

So much fun that I could scream and shout to a crowd

So much fun that I would be greeted with encouragement instead of put-downs

So much fun I would never be rejected again

So much fun that everyone would want to join me

So much fun that I would be a ray of sunshine in this world instead of repellent

So much fun that I would forget about these negative feelings about myself that I have

So much fun that I would be only be given acceptance, not feel unacceptable by the world

Xara Nahara O’Connor


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I am a graduate of the University of Mount Union. I work for ResCare HomeCare as a direct support professional. I was a psychology major and am hoping to get a master's degree in Business Administration with a concentration on healthcare... Somewhere. I am still interested in English and theatre. Writing had always been one of my passions until recently. It takes too much time and effort, which is why I just draw comics now. Believe it or not, drawing comics is easier for me to express myself than writing. I also love animals. When I am not working hard on whatever project I happen to have my hands on, I am at home playing with my animals. I live with two cats named Garfield and Oreo. I also love to listen to all kinds of music, such as The Birthday Massacre, Emilie Autumn, The Cruxshadows, The Cranberries, Celldweller, Emperor, R.E.M., Future Funk Squad, Symphony X, Einherjer, Borknagar, and Nightwish. And I'm married. But don't tell the government. They suck the fun out of it.

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10 thoughts on “So much fun”

    1. Thanks, sweetie. And I try to love myself, but I am just missing days when I was around friends and could talk without feeling like I was wrong all the time. When you feel like you are wrong ALL THE TIME, it isn’t much fun. I have fun here and there, but I always feel like I am doing something wrong even if I am not. It’s frustrating, confusing, and just wish I didn’t feel this way. I wish I could be understood and articulate my feelings to the point where people could understand what the hell I am saying.

  1. Pretty much everyone in my personal life. And yeah, it is not the move itself that has made me unhappy. It’s the fact that I struggle with people lately, and my family members are at war with each other over the election. I am actually enjoying the people I work with, and my fiancé is doing well. He and I had a great day. It was relaxing.

    Also, I have panic attacks where I burst out. Please forgive me. And it has nothing to do with the location I am in. It just all started to come out more lately because this stuff had been building up inside me for years.

    Thank you for being here for me.

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